110710 Relaxed

For a brief period of time, I thought I could relax. I thought it was time to think about a serious relationship. I met a guy who decided to make time for me. We seemed to be matched. The girls said they had reached the point where they could handle the thought me dating. We made plans, and I shed some of my stress. This weekend, the girls wanted to go with a friend and her parents to the coast. It would be a three or four hour drive each way. They left at five in the morning, and were to be back before midnight, so I made plans to spend the day and late evening with my new beau.

During the week and on the weekend, I got hit with comments about my irresponsibility, my inconsistency, and my Pollyanna attitude about finding work. In particular, I had been hit with comments from other parents about my children. On Saturday, I called Moon only once, and asked how she was doing. I asked when they expected to be back, because she was in the care of a couple of adults, I relyed on their schedule. Then, I discovered that I did not have the current cell numbers of the adults! Moon called, but didn´t talk much because of poor reception, but she had said they were leaving at 9pm. Before it cut off, I told her to text me when she arrived in SA. She said that the dad would drive her to our home.

They were not here at midnight. I called Moon with no answer. I called Agent Em with no answer. I left messages. I called or left a message every half hour all night long. Finally, just after my 8am call, Moon called me. She explained that she had said that they were staying the night at her friend´s house before coming home in the morning. She had been so tired, they forgot to text me when they arrived. With the bad reception, I had not all heard all of that. I only heard the part about coming home. I had determined that I would not call the police until 9am, so it was good that she had awakened with my last call.

For a few hours last week, I had relaxed and didn´t keep all my focus on the girls. Now, my neck and shoulders have returned to feeling like teak mounted on mahogany. My personal life is going to have to wait a few more years, because my children come first.