Cousin to Moon's boyfriend. Too much like my younger one was.
Little Girl Lost
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Life's a Beach
You Are Determined |
 You do things your way, and you always get results. You'll work as hard and long as it takes. You are completely fearless. You refuse to let fear control you. You are proactive, and you try not to let anything slide. You avoid lazy thinking habits. You always have a way when your will demands it. You don't consider failure an option. |
Monday, July 11, 2011
110711 Moms
When Moon was a baby, Susan Smith murdered her two boys for the sake of keeping a boyfriend. I have a picture of baby Moon playing happily in front of a television that was showing the story. In 2001, Andrea Yates drowned four out of five of her children a mere 200 miles from were I live. Last week, the Casey Anthony trial ended with a verdict few, if any, liked.
Do people think that I am like those moms? When four-year-old Jovonie Ochoa of San Antonio died of starvation and his family went to trial, people looked at five-year-old Agent Em's skeletal form and glared at me. They compared her tiny body to Moon's tall plumpness, and asked me if I were feeding the younger. Any time my emotions surfaced, someone suggested counselling. Surely I was a danger to my own children! Someone actually went to my minister to say that I was ruining children's futures! Health and Human Services investigated me in 2005. It proved groundless. Last year, another agent told me that they had the power to take my children from me, even though they were now teens. All of this is based on isolated incidents and what other, infamous mothers have done! Meanwhile real crime slips through the cracks.
Ask my children what they think. Are teens supposed to act out? Are they supposed to lie? Are they supposed to yell at their parents? Are they supposed to do their best to break every law, rule, and guideline set by their parents and school officials? That would appear to be the norm. (I taught high school, remember?) Mine, however, respect and obey authority. If one or the other has a problem with a rule, we talk about it. My children talk to me. WHY IS MY METHODOLOGY SO WRONG?!
There is economic prejudice in this country. It is probably world-wide and crosses all time. Because I have a lack of money, it seems to be expected that I am a low-life, under-educated moron who cannot be expected to handle life as well as someone with a Phd who seldom if ever suffered a lack of any material object. Publicly, I am retreating back into my shell, and I don't plan to emerge until 2016, when the younger reaches age 18.
Do people think that I am like those moms? When four-year-old Jovonie Ochoa of San Antonio died of starvation and his family went to trial, people looked at five-year-old Agent Em's skeletal form and glared at me. They compared her tiny body to Moon's tall plumpness, and asked me if I were feeding the younger. Any time my emotions surfaced, someone suggested counselling. Surely I was a danger to my own children! Someone actually went to my minister to say that I was ruining children's futures! Health and Human Services investigated me in 2005. It proved groundless. Last year, another agent told me that they had the power to take my children from me, even though they were now teens. All of this is based on isolated incidents and what other, infamous mothers have done! Meanwhile real crime slips through the cracks.
Ask my children what they think. Are teens supposed to act out? Are they supposed to lie? Are they supposed to yell at their parents? Are they supposed to do their best to break every law, rule, and guideline set by their parents and school officials? That would appear to be the norm. (I taught high school, remember?) Mine, however, respect and obey authority. If one or the other has a problem with a rule, we talk about it. My children talk to me. WHY IS MY METHODOLOGY SO WRONG?!
There is economic prejudice in this country. It is probably world-wide and crosses all time. Because I have a lack of money, it seems to be expected that I am a low-life, under-educated moron who cannot be expected to handle life as well as someone with a Phd who seldom if ever suffered a lack of any material object. Publicly, I am retreating back into my shell, and I don't plan to emerge until 2016, when the younger reaches age 18.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
110710 Relaxed
For a brief period of time, I thought I could relax. I thought it was time to think about a serious relationship. I met a guy who decided to make time for me. We seemed to be matched. The girls said they had reached the point where they could handle the thought me dating. We made plans, and I shed some of my stress. This weekend, the girls wanted to go with a friend and her parents to the coast. It would be a three or four hour drive each way. They left at five in the morning, and were to be back before midnight, so I made plans to spend the day and late evening with my new beau.
During the week and on the weekend, I got hit with comments about my irresponsibility, my inconsistency, and my Pollyanna attitude about finding work. In particular, I had been hit with comments from other parents about my children. On Saturday, I called Moon only once, and asked how she was doing. I asked when they expected to be back, because she was in the care of a couple of adults, I relyed on their schedule. Then, I discovered that I did not have the current cell numbers of the adults! Moon called, but didn´t talk much because of poor reception, but she had said they were leaving at 9pm. Before it cut off, I told her to text me when she arrived in SA. She said that the dad would drive her to our home.
They were not here at midnight. I called Moon with no answer. I called Agent Em with no answer. I left messages. I called or left a message every half hour all night long. Finally, just after my 8am call, Moon called me. She explained that she had said that they were staying the night at her friend´s house before coming home in the morning. She had been so tired, they forgot to text me when they arrived. With the bad reception, I had not all heard all of that. I only heard the part about coming home. I had determined that I would not call the police until 9am, so it was good that she had awakened with my last call.
For a few hours last week, I had relaxed and didn´t keep all my focus on the girls. Now, my neck and shoulders have returned to feeling like teak mounted on mahogany. My personal life is going to have to wait a few more years, because my children come first.
During the week and on the weekend, I got hit with comments about my irresponsibility, my inconsistency, and my Pollyanna attitude about finding work. In particular, I had been hit with comments from other parents about my children. On Saturday, I called Moon only once, and asked how she was doing. I asked when they expected to be back, because she was in the care of a couple of adults, I relyed on their schedule. Then, I discovered that I did not have the current cell numbers of the adults! Moon called, but didn´t talk much because of poor reception, but she had said they were leaving at 9pm. Before it cut off, I told her to text me when she arrived in SA. She said that the dad would drive her to our home.
They were not here at midnight. I called Moon with no answer. I called Agent Em with no answer. I left messages. I called or left a message every half hour all night long. Finally, just after my 8am call, Moon called me. She explained that she had said that they were staying the night at her friend´s house before coming home in the morning. She had been so tired, they forgot to text me when they arrived. With the bad reception, I had not all heard all of that. I only heard the part about coming home. I had determined that I would not call the police until 9am, so it was good that she had awakened with my last call.
For a few hours last week, I had relaxed and didn´t keep all my focus on the girls. Now, my neck and shoulders have returned to feeling like teak mounted on mahogany. My personal life is going to have to wait a few more years, because my children come first.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
110630 Just a Day in Which I was Bummed About Politics
I should have read the Word this morning. After this, I shall. Political commentary makes me angry, as does lack of a certain kind of exercise. Neither situation is anything new in my life. In the early 70s, I took history from a brash native Texan with a famous Texan surname. She taught me world history and/or American history. (Texas history was taught in 4th and 7th grades by other native Texans who drilled FREEDOM into my head. Texan Braveheart, anyone? My high school history teacher was certainly of Scottish descent.)
One comment she made may have been a quote, but I clearly remember the way she said it. "Tell a lie long enough and loudly enough, and the people will believe it." She was referring to Hitler's claim of German superiority. As a German descendant, from a town with a German name and a region made up of a great many German descendants, I know that Germans do a lot of things well. Few cultures match theirs in diligence, perseverance, and attention to detail. At one time, the finest machines and the finest engineers came from Germany. That is why such a tiny country almost took over the world in the last century. Even as late as the 1960s, it was GERMAN scientists who provided the brain power for the space race. That, however, does not make them 'superior'.
Today, politicians are blasting us with other lies. Here is a partial list:
1. Man has more effect on climate than the sun does. Tell that to the dinosaurs.
2. Keynesian economics works, or Reagonomics was a fluke that simply appeared to work. Reagan turned what was almost another Great Depression into prosperity inside of three years, and that was while fighting Congress every step of the way AND backing down the USSR.
3. American liberals are kind. (They physically and openly attack anyone who does not agree with them -- on sight. 'Hate speech' and derogatory terms from a liberal are not considered 'hate speech'. Example, calling Sarah Palin's daughter a 'cunt' is truth, but pointing out that the decline of two-parent families has lead to more juvenile crime is 'hate speech', even when facts and figures prove it. There are more examples of this than I can even recall! Some vicious acts have been done to people I know personally!)
4. All conservatives are either wealthy CEOs who cheated to get their money, or ignorant, inbred poor white trash who just do what they are told. (I am a free thinker who is neither rich nor ignorant. Neither do any of my conservative friends fit that description.)
5. American oil companies make too much money, but Venezuela, Iran, and Iraq don't? (American oil companies want to hire Americans, and they make less than 1% profit. The other countries make 1000% profit, or more, and that money goes straight into terrorism.)
Can we come back from this? Or are people my age and younger so indoctrinated into the socialist propaganda of 'equal results'? Everyone is NOT the same! Some people work harder or work smarter than others. Some people want a free ride without effort. Some people have higher moral standards. Some people say there is no such thing as a moral standard. Some people work for the greater good. Some people actually pay attention and know that the greater good is the freedom to make mistakes.
Only God can sort out this mess. Is this the end? Oh, that would be convenient! I'm sure that many people have wished that in other terrible times. What is the worst it can get? I'm sorry, but I can imagine it a lot worse. World wide communism? World wide Islam? Something like The Matrix, where humans are all slaves? Yes, it can get worse. It will get worse when Christ takes away all those who are born again. We are all that stands against total chaos. As bad as it seems to be, we are not yet seeing the wrath to come!
One comment she made may have been a quote, but I clearly remember the way she said it. "Tell a lie long enough and loudly enough, and the people will believe it." She was referring to Hitler's claim of German superiority. As a German descendant, from a town with a German name and a region made up of a great many German descendants, I know that Germans do a lot of things well. Few cultures match theirs in diligence, perseverance, and attention to detail. At one time, the finest machines and the finest engineers came from Germany. That is why such a tiny country almost took over the world in the last century. Even as late as the 1960s, it was GERMAN scientists who provided the brain power for the space race. That, however, does not make them 'superior'.
Today, politicians are blasting us with other lies. Here is a partial list:
1. Man has more effect on climate than the sun does. Tell that to the dinosaurs.
2. Keynesian economics works, or Reagonomics was a fluke that simply appeared to work. Reagan turned what was almost another Great Depression into prosperity inside of three years, and that was while fighting Congress every step of the way AND backing down the USSR.
3. American liberals are kind. (They physically and openly attack anyone who does not agree with them -- on sight. 'Hate speech' and derogatory terms from a liberal are not considered 'hate speech'. Example, calling Sarah Palin's daughter a 'cunt' is truth, but pointing out that the decline of two-parent families has lead to more juvenile crime is 'hate speech', even when facts and figures prove it. There are more examples of this than I can even recall! Some vicious acts have been done to people I know personally!)
4. All conservatives are either wealthy CEOs who cheated to get their money, or ignorant, inbred poor white trash who just do what they are told. (I am a free thinker who is neither rich nor ignorant. Neither do any of my conservative friends fit that description.)
5. American oil companies make too much money, but Venezuela, Iran, and Iraq don't? (American oil companies want to hire Americans, and they make less than 1% profit. The other countries make 1000% profit, or more, and that money goes straight into terrorism.)
Can we come back from this? Or are people my age and younger so indoctrinated into the socialist propaganda of 'equal results'? Everyone is NOT the same! Some people work harder or work smarter than others. Some people want a free ride without effort. Some people have higher moral standards. Some people say there is no such thing as a moral standard. Some people work for the greater good. Some people actually pay attention and know that the greater good is the freedom to make mistakes.
Only God can sort out this mess. Is this the end? Oh, that would be convenient! I'm sure that many people have wished that in other terrible times. What is the worst it can get? I'm sorry, but I can imagine it a lot worse. World wide communism? World wide Islam? Something like The Matrix, where humans are all slaves? Yes, it can get worse. It will get worse when Christ takes away all those who are born again. We are all that stands against total chaos. As bad as it seems to be, we are not yet seeing the wrath to come!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
110629 Car Update
Took it to the shop, and it will cost $2000 to $3000 to fix, and that does not include body parts! I am reusing what was damaged. While the car runs, there was significant damage in the engine compartment. She has a job, now. Guess all the proceeds will be going to the car. The good news is that a friend is loaning me a vehicle for the week.
Monday, June 27, 2011
110627 Car Accident.
Moon had a car accident while driving two friends to something. She was not going to tell anyone, but it was difficult to hide. The SUV she hit didn't seem to have any damage whatsoever, but the driver filed a claim with our insurance anyway. Our car may be undrivable. The hood will not go back into place, and the body has been pushed so that one of the back doors is crinkled. The steering did something really odd yesterday, and it makes extra loud road noise. To top it off, Moon resented it when I took her keys! She wants to know why she cannot drive. Two accidents in two months maybe? She will have to pay for her own insurance now, too. I will not be able afford to cover her with this kind of record.
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